Collecting Tickets Gifts

"I've got a couple of tickets for Wild Bill's 'Wild West Show'.. only $800 each!"

Will Sell Soul for Pope Tickets

"There are 45,000 people at the stadium but only 500 of them bought tickets...the other ones are security guards for our 250 million euro player!"

"You can bring in the rest of the fare tomorrow."

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

"It's official"..."It's a drought!"

"Ironically, this is the living room."

Larry's used art

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

Skipping Horse

"These aren’t the droids you’re looking for."

Grace For Flies

James Bond in a Snow Globe

International Women's Day

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

Packaging Russian Dolls

"Unfortunately, once the child contracts Pokémon, he lives with it forever."

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

Director/Action Man toy.

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

Cat woman shopping for cats.

"Now here's one that has the glamour above the table."

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

Seagiraffes

Cocktails on the verandah.

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

New and improved! BunkerBuster! Get out of the sand trap every single time - or your money back!!

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

'Goodness, no Doctor, my husband is not calling you any insulting names. He's a duck and that's the only word he knows.'

"Any idea how long your family might be visiting?"

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

Faster, Georges, faster!