Colleague Who Is A Teacher Gifts

"There'll be trouble when the Chalkface hear the news - we've run out of chalk!"

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

A Puppet Named Juan

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

No, you idiots, they don't include a "comments" section.

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

Where your mind & battle are los

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

"1984 by George Orwell. Project 2025. Presidential transition project."

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

Ethics exam cheater.

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

"To torture an insect or not to torture an insect, that is the question."

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

Copycats

I should be a writer when I grow up...

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

Gender Equality

Computer Room.

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

I've been teaching art history for decades. Students today ask new kinds of questions. No, I doubt a gluten-free menu option was available that evening. Nope, the artist was not making a statement about climate change. No, despite the umbrellas, this is not about sun exposure safety. Well, yes, I suppose you can say it's a selfie.

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

At the Museum

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'