Cold Drink Avoider T-Shirts

'No ice for me thanks: I'm sick of ice everywhere...'

Happy Hour

'So it's the Mumm's Cordon Rouge, '98 Pouilly-Fuisse, '86 Chateau Margaux, and the '92 Barsac - would you like any food?'

'I'm having trouble with my drinking. Arthritis in my elbow.'

On Valentine's Day, sometimes you don't need cards, candy or flowers from the ones who love you.

"Ah! I see you've found a cold beer to your liking, sir."

The Stages of Coffee Addiction

"It's pumpin spice latte season - I feel it in the air."

"Just for once, why don't we forget the poor and blow the lot down the local tavern?"

Child selling cold lemonade in the winter

"And while you're waiting for your drinks can I get you something from the bar?"

'Single or double?'

'Don't drink on an empty head.'

"I was deadwood but I'm out of a job. I guess I'm driftwood."

"You appear to have caught that bug that's been going around my waiting room."

"Here, but you'd better hurry and drink it before it gets warm."

'The ice machine's broken!!'

Global Warming.

'I'm having what he's having.'

"India ink, straight."

"And a bag of peanuts."

"Can't keep away, eh...?"

Try and stay cool, Y'all

'For future reference, just the bottle goes in the chiller.'

OUT of ORDER

'I drink so much alcohol I'm afraid to smoke!'

"This is why I like my wine chilled."

Beefeater cocktail

"I thought, 'Join me in a cup of coffee', was just an expression!"

"Hey, Honey, is the lake still co...never mind!"

Coffee Morning

'Sad hour. All drinks double the usual price'

'Cold enough now?' (Beer in block of ice.)

Pet Cryogenics.

'To you, it spoils the wine; to me, it improves the ice cubes.'