Avoider Of Colds T-Shirts

"You appear to have caught that bug that's been going around my waiting room."

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

"Bless You."

Rude Snowpeople

Rent a Room With Hot Water

"Fruity nose, hints of wild cherry, soothing on the palate, goes well with cough and cold."

'Here's an interesting article. 'Cold or Seasonal Allergy?''

"For years after Vietnam, I woke up screaming about the cold weather in Toronto."

"Before someone says anything, yes, it was a long winter."

"I cloned myself to take care of my Thanksgiving duties while I watch football in peace."

"Help me! I'm trapped. In a dead end job."

'Now there goes a good Salesman...!'

'Your wife didn't do this. I'd recognize your handwriting anywhere.'

"And where exactly is Timbuktu?"

I Love Winter!

'Any place that doesn't have snow.'

'Well it was a pretty good year.'

Your nose is running...which I guessing is more than I can say for your feet.

"Oh boy, the forecast is "Freezing" today, and then "Deep Freeze" for the next two days..."

Yesterday of Minnesota.

"It's typical cold/flu medicine, but the extra strength advertising made me buy it."

"These thermal boots which the scientist left behind are great. Finally my feet are warm."

'No, it's true, I've never seen snow... I always seem to end up going South for winter...'

"Worst case of hives I've ever encountered."

'I've got to get away from Christmas... I've got to get away...'

Indoor sauna.

You know it's a really bad winter when. . .

Sneeze Police

'Stay warm last night?'

"Boy, in the cold light of day it's really freaking cold!"

Foot in ice cube.

'I've done it! A cold tablet that tastes like chicken soup!'

'How about a bike ride?' 'Nah, the seat hurts my butt, and I'd have to put air in the tires, and I'd have to put shorts on so my pant leg doesn't get caught and...' 'And you'd have to get up.' 'And I'd have to get up.'

"If it's gluten-free, peanut-free, lactose-free and fat-free, why does it cost more?"