Cognitive Improvement Journey Pillows

Woman says, 'How did your memory improvement class go last night?' Man answers, 'I completely forgot about it!'

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

"Let me slip into something a little more thoughtful."

Super Strength, Impervious to Bullets And Explosions

"The overthinker"

'Trouble is they always forget to return them...'

'When my business turned into a lemon, I made lemonade....but that also failed when nobody liked its taste'

"Have you been working out?"

"Commandments aren't really selling these days. However, we're willing to consider self-help tips or personal improvement ideas."

Burnout Syndrome...

"You've changed."

"I feel like I don’t even know my own husband ... and it’s driving me wild!"

"Look, son, real estate."

'I'm very confused. I never had a father. I was raised by two mummies.'

Career Analyst "Well I've looked at your file and yes, your job is rubbish"

"Most people forget they've had amnesia."

Men's Health Screenings.

How Optimism Works

Mafia Short-Term Memory Clinic. 'Fuhgettaboutit.'

"How come I can't remember what I forget, but I always remember that I forgot something!"

"There's a wonderful book on memory tricks here, but I can't remember what I did with it!"

"What does she have that I don't?"

"These quiet walks in the park remind me of what a psycho you were before you started taking the meds."

Book store has a book called 'Mind Games,' which is floating magically in the air.

"The thing is, you have to really want to change."

"You can't let the tick birds continue to define you."

'Therapy always works best in a safe environment ... such as your old tree house.'

Study more to pass more tests.

"Ambitions. . . To . . . Er. . . Um . . . Become. . . Er. . . Um. . . A. . . Er. . . Um . . . Motivational. . . Er. . . Um. . . Speaker."

"You're starting to look like your old self again."

'Nothing seems funny anymore.'

"We can't go on, year after year, reliving the French revolution."

"How learning curves feel... Before: Holy hell During: I'm not gonna make it! After: That wasn't so bad! The next time: Again?!!"

"… and a big shout-out to my hippocampus, without which I wouldn’t be standing here saying words."

"I think, therefore I am depressed."