Cognitive Challengers Gifts

You spend way too much time and energy stewing over things, Al

'My imaginary playmate can whip your imaginary playmate!'

"It says 'break glass' but it doesn't say what glass!'

"Sorry mum, but I just don't get the decimal system..."

I'm not good with names but never forget a face. Of course, that's not very useful right now.

Miss America IQ Pageant

"Lori, go ahead and toss in 'Lolita.' Now, what's next?" "We'll need more lighter fluid." "'The Lottery' is devils work." "We must protect the children." "Book burning club"

The New Fundamentals of Art: 'We'll begin with the most basic figure, the trademark attorney...'

"Excuse me, Professor. I think I might have spotted a flaw in your theory!"

'And from this point follow me very carefully.'

'...and, if your idea is so imaginative, innovative and original, why aren't our competitors doing it?'

"How on earth do you get this blasted box to open...?"

Bee Chess

'I've got it written down...'

"I have no idea where we parked the car, or why we exist."

"That Melinda Alvarez thinks she's so smart! Well, I've been studying, and I'm gonna teach her a lesson on the test we have today!"

Paper being carefully folded until it resembles a scrunched up paper ball.

'Why do it the easy way when you can do it the right way?'

'I have your MRI results. Half your brain is clogged with passwords and the other half is clogged with user names.'

"Thanks, I'll write that down."

"Why won’t you just admit you forgot where you parked the car?"

'In our thirty years of marriage she's squirreled away loads of money, but she can't remember where.'

"Don't take it so hard. It was a really tough maze."

'I've gotten over my fear of tests, but now I seem to have developed studying anxiety.'

'...no you can't phone a friend!'

'How come you keep forgetting when it's your round?'

"So, Mrs. Miller, would you tell me briefly your methods for teaching reading, your overall philosophy of education, your views on testing, your ideas on discipline, your opinions about homework, the ways you could excite kids about science, and how you would upgrade math skills in our school should you be hired?"

I'll bet with age would come wisdom, if only we would remember a @#%* thing.

In case of computer breakdown break glass

"I hope this isn't another one of your crazy bounce-me-off-the-wall ideas."

Can you tell me how to sue you for flunking me out of law school?

Kid coming home from school to parent: 'I couldn't remember my locker combination, so I got a tattoo.'

'Throw me the thing! That thing with leaves that hangs from the trees! You know! The Tarzan swing thing!'

"Tom, this is an ideas meeting, not a planning meeting."

"Answer your question? You mean in real time?"