Cognitive Cartoonist Gifts

I know I'm considered a genius, Axel, but really, I'm only human. I still put my hat on like any other man: one leg at a time.

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

The Department of Really Stupid Ideas: 'Most people think they just appear out of thin air! But the truth is, there's a great deal of very hard work involved!'

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

Trump Administration Raising White Flag in Ukraine

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

"We seem to be spending more on defence than on things to defend"

"We only got six days of funding."

Torturing the English Language

Can You Spot the Differences?

CSI: Mother Goose Unit...'Hmmm...I'm beginning to suspect that perhaps mister Dumpty's demise wasn't simply a tragic accident.'

Trump pardons

Claus 2.0

The Map of the human brain

'Some of those youngsters have come up with a terrific new idea - feathers.'

You Are Here - Uncle Sam's Exit Strategy

The aliens froze, gripped by a primal fear. This time there would be no abduction.

Sure, he likes it here - he's a cartoonist.

'Table scraps, doggie-bag goodies, dropped hot dogs, the cat's dish of food and your master's slippers.'

"Elementary, my dear Watson- the cartoonist did it."

Man, my cat sneaks into the weirdest spots.

"Don’t worry, this guy is totally cool. Just don’t mention the Red Baron."

Where Indian ink came from.

Shampoo.

Donald Trump Removing Aggressor Label From Vladimir Putin

"The best part is that we got hell to pay for it."

CIA report

"We're odd looking but just as good."

It isn't widely known that Michelangelo was the first in a long line of cartoonists to buck the family tradition.

Glance Exchange

"I know we got early to catch him...but he looks so cute I just can't eat him!"

"Baldo, you're a very good artist! You should put your talent to use."

'Yak, yak, yak.'

101 uses of a dead cat: disguise.