Coffee Crusader Gifts

I've checked the spreadsheet, minion. How do you explain yourself? What'd I do, boss? Since you started working here 13 years ago, average rainfall in the township has plummeted by 15%. We're now in a drought. That's led to coffee and cocoa purchases also plummeting by an average of 15%. I'm going to have to give you a 15% pay cut to compensate for your deleterious effect on the local climate. Very bad man.

Triple espresso. Forget it, Uncle Mort. Your doctors said no caffeine. I am not your Uncle Mort, I am someone else altogether. Oh yeah? Who are you? I am … Drinkum … Coffeeman … Worthington-Smythe … of the Florida Coffeeman-Worthington-Smythes. You may have heard of us ... we're a family of um ... Troubadours. I, myself, wrote several ballads for the likes of Sinatra, Pat Boone, and Jimi Hendrix. So if I were to Google that right now, Google would confirm that? Google is an abomination!!! One ge

'I see you've managed to cut your coffee consumption in half.'

'It's been an awful day, we lost a three million pound contract and the coffee machine broke down!'

"...And pull up you're cup sleeve young man!"

"Can we do that again tomorrow night?"

Come in, minion. What's up, boss? I'm writing a novel. It's a thriller about an intrepid caf

We need a new eco project. Ok. Let's get locally grown food into the school cafeteria. What's our strategy? We can start with the potatoes. I'll make the poster. We want home fries.

We're here at House of Java cafe at an all-too-familiar scene. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Tommy Jones, a local boy, has been caught stealing a scone. A minor offense? Not to the cafe's proprietor. He's demanding the boy be sentenced as an adult. But I'm eight! Wahhh! Add a year to the sentence for whining and crying.

'Not that sort of body building program!'

"Repent" "Give alms" "Resist temptation" "Pray for me" "Fasting" "Acts of service" "Sacrifice" "Abstain" "You are ashes" "You are dust" "No meat"

Back to work...

"That's it young man. . . No more energy drinks for you!"

You've Had Enough!

A dog at the bakery.

"Quick, I need a drink. Someone just called me Ma'am."

First Church of Non-Denominational Money Worship.

'My secret? Stay away from Halloween candy.'

"Don't talk to me before discover coffee."

Coffee Shop and Battery Charging Station

Halloweek: Eating candy seven days straight.

Man on a unicycle trying to guard credit from nasty 'Bankruptcy'.

Pinata Zombies

"We're wasting our time. He gets them free at work."

"I know it's not in our nature, but we really gotta stop charging everything."

'I always feel at the end of the day I could've taken credit for more.'

"A bunch of kids next door are going berserk with a baseball bat! Call 911. I'm losing candy fast!"

Euro parachute is not keeping Europe aloft.

Real coffee vs usual vending machine stuff

"No caffè latte? And you call yourselves a bookstore?"

Bake Sale! To benefit our town animal shelter

I am coffee and I need more coffee

Food Pyramid

"Tell me the truth. . . what happens to all the leftover cake scraps in The Great British Baking Show?"

"I don't see much borrowing on your credit report but I do see a lot of begging and stealing."