Coffee Conqueror T-Shirts

"Ever since I gave up coffee I feel a lot less jittery."

'You're being promoted to vice prez of personal energy management! You'll be the guy who goes out for coffee and donuts!'

'It's all decaffeinated!'

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

A woman wearing a skin sitting behind a desk with a nameplate that reads "Sheena, Queen of the corporate jungle."

PREPARING A POMEGRANATE FOR DUMMIES

'Will you be long, fixing this leak? I'll have to put my Bert's dinner on in ten minutes.'

Why am I running?

'Of course, the toll on my personal life has been enormous.'

"Do you know I fought an hour with that salmon you're eating."

“Our numbers grow greater and greater. Soon the era of the spices will be at hand”

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

Am Awful Crammer.

"I believe he was the victim of a hostile takeover."

Gary Basks in the glow of a fifteen-minute window with no empty cardboard boxes in the house.

'Going back to work now that the kids are grown is one thing, Martha. Mounting a hostile takeover bid of my company is another!'

'...and what's more, my databank has more data than your databank.'

"The night raid on the kitchen bench was a disaster sir! The owner woke up, came downstairs for a glass of water and attacked us!"

"On the weekend I finally beat the club pro...so I don't need you anymore!"

"OK, hands up who’s vegan... lactose intolerant... peanut allergies..."

"You know, statistically speaking, at least one of these gingerbread men is gay."

'I've had a lot of experience at this. My Mom keeps the cookie jar on top of the refrigerator.'

"I advise a slow, steady stream of lawsuits to weaken your enemies resistance. We call it time release litigation."

A woman's work is never done!

'When you've finished the washing up and you're certain you've cleaned absolutely everything... you'll always find another teaspoon.'

"I can't get the price sticker off this non stick pan, you sold me!"

'He works in Acquisitions.'

A day in the life of a dish sink

'I see you've managed to cut your coffee consumption in half.'

'I sent an employee to a motivational seminar once. He came back and took my job.'

Thanksgiving: The holiday where aluminum foil is king!

Star Executive