Coffee Break Philosophers Gifts

"I can't continue working these hours...I feel as though I'm missing Michael's childhood...." "His name's Mark!"

"My email is down... talk to me."

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

The Department of Blind-Side Bias, Knowledge Gaps and Really Great Coffee.

'We've just become the biggest corporation in America.. let's celebrate today and begin downsizing tomorrow.'

Well, I see Wilcox is finally using his head...as a paperweight!

"You call this sweating bullets over the Jackson account? What caliber?"

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

"The bad news is we've fired 80% of your office. The good news is we're fixing the coffee machine."

'Thank God it's Friday', thought the watercooler.

"Of course I have a life. Not one worth living, mind you."

Every morning the office gossip was cascaded down...

'Yes,we have equal pay in that we are grossly underpaid, all of us.'

'We're having an energy crisis of sorts. The coffee machine is broken.'

'Bring me the Wimbish report and a short worm, Ms Perkins, no time for lunch today.'

"Your idea is strong. Really strong. But I've gotta ask myself, is it too much espresso for a decaf world?"

"Guess we are going to the coffee shop!"

'My stretch goal for this year is to get 52 weekly paychecks.'

'I wish I were as popular as the coffee machine.'

'Water cooler's really busy this time of day,'

"I think somebody thinks I've been away from my desk too long."

"Any yet he's always on my case."

'I'll accept two potions of white crystalline sucrose in final settlement.'

'I'm looking for people who find me intimidating.'

Nothing like that first cup of coffee, eh, Frank?

With one badly timed dunk teabreak was ruined.

"The project must be failing! The manager just suggested I take all the credit for it!"

"Turns out it's easier to live at work than work from home."

Isn't that a surveillance camera?

'I suppose you're wondering why you're not on it!'

Trust your instinct...listen to that little haunting voice that gives you subtle messages...'call in sick.'

'You dunk your donuts your way...'

'You're lucky, Ted. You're the only one around here who doesn't get treated like a number.'

"I work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to resign."