Coffee Break Philosopher Gifts

"According to the survey,retention is helped by training and money...There's no mention of chaining staff to their desks."

"Anyone here not a feminist?"

'Yes,we have equal pay in that we are grossly underpaid, all of us.'

'We've just become the biggest corporation in America.. let's celebrate today and begin downsizing tomorrow.'

"Of course I have a life. Not one worth living, mind you."

"Call me a crazy optimist, but I can imagine a world where the grass is greener on my side."

"My email is down... talk to me."

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

The Department of Blind-Side Bias, Knowledge Gaps and Really Great Coffee.

"You don't whisper anymore."

Well, I see Wilcox is finally using his head...as a paperweight!

"You call this sweating bullets over the Jackson account? What caliber?"

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

Every morning the office gossip was cascaded down...

'Thank God it's Friday', thought the watercooler.

"Oh, don't mind that, it's just my body of unseen work."

"The bad news is we've fired 80% of your office. The good news is we're fixing the coffee machine."

'We're having an energy crisis of sorts. The coffee machine is broken.'

'Bring me the Wimbish report and a short worm, Ms Perkins, no time for lunch today.'

"Guess we are going to the coffee shop!"

"Your idea is strong. Really strong. But I've gotta ask myself, is it too much espresso for a decaf world?"

'My stretch goal for this year is to get 52 weekly paychecks.'

'I wish I were as popular as the coffee machine.'

Nothing like that first cup of coffee, eh, Frank?

"I think somebody thinks I've been away from my desk too long."

'It's true that money can't buy everything, Caldwell, but it's not healthy to dwell on it.'

'Water cooler's really busy this time of day,'

"Any yet he's always on my case."

'I'll accept two potions of white crystalline sucrose in final settlement.'

Continental Drift.

"Turns out it's easier to live at work than work from home."

With one badly timed dunk teabreak was ruined.

"The project must be failing! The manager just suggested I take all the credit for it!"

'I suppose you're wondering why you're not on it!'

Isn't that a surveillance camera?