Clumsy Texter Pillows

'Sometimes I wish I was all thumbs, then I could text faster.'

Showbiz Awards

"Ma'am, you don't have an ant problem. They're coffee grounds."

'You made a complete fool of yourself at the party last night...I just hope no one knows you were sober.'

"I dropped my goblet!"

"I hope your cast is not itchy, Stacy. I had an itchy cast on my arm once and it itched ALL the time. It felt like crawling ants! Itchy, itchy, itchy..."

'He doesn't actually drink much. He spills most of it!'

"Just great...on my first day on the job."

Baldo's How to Be Uncool: No. 5. Forget how hot the coffee is while you're thinking how cool you look sitting in a coffee shop.

Man carrying crates of eggs about to step on sleeping dog.

Kid drops his 13 flavor ice cream cone

'Maybe you need to practice walking.'

'Guess who I bumped into today? EVERYBODY!'

'I told you not to slam the door!'

'Was that a spiritual insight, or just clumsiness?'

'Well, it WAS worth nine thousand dollars. Sorry about that.'

"I've got a bad feeling about this Kenneth.'

'Can I help it if I was given all thumbs and two left feet?'

"Football concussion - one beer too many at the game, and I fell off my seat."

"If you need me, I'll be in my room watching YouTube videos, texting, Skyping and blowing off my homework."

'I tried to slam a revolving door.'

"I just sent a penny to your bank account for your thoughts."

'Not again?! Honey, let your assistant do the shredding.'

"I dropped my phone and even though I picked it up within 5 seconds, the screen still cracked."

"The good news is I've cleaned up my office. The bad news is I think I threw out my computer."

Newton's Clumsier Brother Discovers Gravity.

Spilt wine

Unlucky sculpture.

"I kept dropping my phone and cracking the screen. So, my parents bought me a thicker cover."

Personal Air Bag.