Clumsy Morning Warriors Gifts

Husband splashing tea over newspaper.

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

"AHHHH, MORNING!"

I hate monday mornings.

The feeding frenzy has begun, gorging ourselves on bowl after bowl of college football.

Business man sees himself as a shark

'Goodbye, dear. This is the kind of day that makes you feel glad to be alive.'

'I won't bother to bath Mum, we're playing again tomorrow!'

'Get out there, Holmes, and pile on!'

"These days, I'm mostly just legislating from the couch."

'It's a devil to start on these damp November Sunday mornings - luckily we have a sidesman who works for the AA.'

"Go back to sleep? Sleep at the office?"

"Awake and doing great"

A spider meal prepping

"It's thrilling to watch them come out in the morning, ready for the kill!"

'Get me a match! The pilot light in our competitive fire is out!'

"I never have a good excuse to be late: The teacher knows my dad wakes me up at dawn..."

"Stu's not a morning person."

' Oh God ! not Friday again ! what happened to Saturday...Sunday...Monday...Tuesday....? '

"I like Monday mornings...and Friday afternoons. But all that in-between stuff bums me out."

'My body is a temple. A temple full of fat people.'

Alarm

"Don't you have a snooze button?"

Rugger.

'For goodness sake, take a mint: You have Spring breath!'

"You have some serious bed head, Dear."

'I went for a walk this morning...' - 'I ran 20 miles... uphill.' - '...and I had bran flakes for breakfast.' - 'Yeah, well I ate 19 sausages, 3 melons, and a horse.' - 'I'm going for a pee.' - 'I swear I could flood this place!!'

Cactus Alarm.

"If the ref wasn't on their side, how come he was wearing their kit?"

In Tray and Out Tray

"Nothing ruins a Friday more than waking up and realizing it's only Thursday."

A football fan chews a football as his team concedes.

'All right, all right, I'm getting up.'