Clumsy Morning Warriors Gifts

Husband splashing tea over newspaper.

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

"AHHHH, MORNING!"

I hate monday mornings.

The feeding frenzy has begun, gorging ourselves on bowl after bowl of college football.

Business man sees himself as a shark

'Goodbye, dear. This is the kind of day that makes you feel glad to be alive.'

'I won't bother to bath Mum, we're playing again tomorrow!'

'Get out there, Holmes, and pile on!'

"These days, I'm mostly just legislating from the couch."

'It's a devil to start on these damp November Sunday mornings - luckily we have a sidesman who works for the AA.'

'What the hell is that guy's problem?'

A spider meal prepping

"Go back to sleep? Sleep at the office?"

"Awake and doing great"

'Get me a match! The pilot light in our competitive fire is out!'

"It's thrilling to watch them come out in the morning, ready for the kill!"

"I like Monday mornings...and Friday afternoons. But all that in-between stuff bums me out."

"Stu's not a morning person."

"I never have a good excuse to be late: The teacher knows my dad wakes me up at dawn..."

' Oh God ! not Friday again ! what happened to Saturday...Sunday...Monday...Tuesday....? '

'My body is a temple. A temple full of fat people.'

Alarm

"Don't you have a snooze button?"

'For goodness sake, take a mint: You have Spring breath!'

'All right, all right, I'm getting up.'

"If the ref wasn't on their side, how come he was wearing their kit?"

We leave Jim alone until he's at least 90% charged. (49%)

"You have some serious bed head, Dear."

'I went for a walk this morning...' - 'I ran 20 miles... uphill.' - '...and I had bran flakes for breakfast.' - 'Yeah, well I ate 19 sausages, 3 melons, and a horse.' - 'I'm going for a pee.' - 'I swear I could flood this place!!'

Mega Corp. Employee Entrance. I like to get to work early, before my brain knows what I'm up to.

Cactus Alarm.

"Nothing ruins a Friday more than waking up and realizing it's only Thursday."

Rugger.

In Tray and Out Tray