Cloud Nine Consumer Gifts

"Who'd have thought it? It turns out you can take it with you when you die."

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

'Stocks plummeted on news of your demise.'

"The last thing I remember was asking my broker if all my money had been in risk-free bonds."

"Your PA isn't due up here for another 27 years. You'll just have to answer the questions yourself."

"It started as an out-of body experience but I forgot the password to get back in."

'I think I'm going to like it here!'

'Eternity isn't bad, so long as they allow us to day-trade.'

"It's very nice. I just think they could add a spa."

"Speaking only for myself, the unexamined life was a total gas!"

The Cheese God

"Once a sinner, always a sinner!"

Heaven on the Phone to Hell - 'We've got Sky.'

Actually, I was looking for a tax haven.

"I know it looks a little rough but we're having all the puffy stuff reupholstered this week."

'I didn't expect Paradise to be so literal...'

"This can't be heaven, where's the shops?"

Heavy angels play ring-toss using halos and thin angel.

I know, I was expecting something different too...

"Assigned to cloud nine! I haven't been there since I caught that twelve pound bass!"

"We're engaged!"

'I save these for casual Fridays.'

Life after death. It's all about altitude. "Whaz up?" "Aside from you pants - everything."

'I'm considered a saint, but my mother always thought I could've done better.'

"Who knew we could take our Frequent Flyer miles with us?"

'Isn't it heaven to always be right...'

'Whoever would have thought you couldn't get in without a jacket and tie?'

"There, would you believe it - Made in China!"

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

"Finally, right?"

"I should totally appear to them."

Site Acquired For 200,000 Homes

'Would you prefer smoking, or non'

You know...these camera shots are the only photos we have of that car.