Clothesline Enthusiast Gifts

Click. Hey! I bet she's taking pictures to show how people are saving energy! Want to see why you should never bet? This will show the town council what an eyesore your clothesline is, Agatha Bell. Nice call.

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

My Brother Al once went through a period of depression, your honor. He would just sit around in his robe all day. Then his psychiatrist got him out of his funk. Would you like to have his doctor's phone number? ? ?

Mystery Solved - Boxers or Briefs, 'Thanks but you could have just told me.'

"This realm isn't big enough for both of our killer outfits."

"That shirt is so last year."

'They're both nice - which can you ill afford least?'

"Not more sleeve alterations?!"

'Of course we can fix your sweater but we'll have to contact the sheep to match the wool!'

“This daily metamorphosis never fails to amaze me. Around the house, I’m a perfect idiot. I come to court, futon a black robe, and, by God, I’m it!”

'How does this one feel?'

Boxers vs. Briefs

"Tammy's Style Shop went on a selling spree."

'This is a very important trial, Ferguson -- you'd better put pants on.'

F&E Designs. My reversible jacket didn't turn out very well.

'And don't shrink it in a hot wash.'

'Food has replaced sex in my life. Now I can't even get into my own pants.'

Presentation Skills: 1. Preparation

"Is that my skirt?!!"

It's my summer robe.

"He just woke up from hibernation."

'According to your love line, I should be calling a cop right now!'

F and E Dry Cleaners. I've added custom touches for some of our customers. I assumed the marathoner wants her colors to run. And the investigative journalist wants the dirt out there for everybody to see. I shrink the clothes for the psychotherapist, of course. And I limit the starch for the dietitian. This is for the writer of mystery novels? Yeah, I think he'll love it! The more wrinkles the better!

"It's so drapey—should I get something with a crisper line?"

Sweaters. Remember, son, we're men. We walk in, we buy, we walk out. No browsing.

Professor Lars P. Olafson. Inventor of the scatter cushion.

'You're going to school dressed like that? I can hardly see your underwear!'

Getting older is . . . when you start to dress for comfort rather than style.

"Don't worry. The button is purely decorative."

Teddy for each day of the week

'I thought you said 36 inch neck and 16 inch sleeve.'

“If I buy this sweater, we’ll also have to buy a rustic little place upstate.”

'I know you want to draw attentin to your blog, but having a wardrobe malfunction won't help.'

'But you particularly wanted a sleeveless pullover!'

'Mom, you did say it is a bath robe.'