Clothesline Aficionado Gifts

Agatha! That clothesline is an aesthetic crime! We're in West Fester historic district. Your flapping underwear doesn't fit in! How do you think our ancestors dried their clothes, Prudence? I'll see you at the next town meeting. My underwear is as historic as it gets.

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

My Brother Al once went through a period of depression, your honor. He would just sit around in his robe all day. Then his psychiatrist got him out of his funk. Would you like to have his doctor's phone number? ? ?

Dang! My shorts are riding up on me again!

"This realm isn't big enough for both of our killer outfits."

"Underweird bras."

"That shirt is so last year."

'They're both nice - which can you ill afford least?'

"Working from home is a great idea, Dad. We'd just like to establish some kind of dress code."

"Many of us are worrying, Brother Daniel, that you've become too clothes conscious."

Happy Brithday

'It's our latest line-suits for t.v announcers'

'Of course we can fix your sweater but we'll have to contact the sheep to match the wool!'

“This daily metamorphosis never fails to amaze me. Around the house, I’m a perfect idiot. I come to court, futon a black robe, and, by God, I’m it!”

F&E Designs. My reversible jacket didn't turn out very well.

"Tammy's Style Shop went on a selling spree."

Caravan Club shop is selling Hold-Ups.

'This is a very important trial, Ferguson -- you'd better put pants on.'

"He'll do anything to get his underwear sponsors a mention!"

'Food has replaced sex in my life. Now I can't even get into my own pants.'

Presentation Skills: 1. Preparation

You know you're getting old when....

"It's so drapey—should I get something with a crisper line?"

"C'mon. I've been saving for a rainy day.''

"Is that my skirt?!!"

F and E Dry Cleaners. I've added custom touches for some of our customers. I assumed the marathoner wants her colors to run. And the investigative journalist wants the dirt out there for everybody to see. I shrink the clothes for the psychotherapist, of course. And I limit the starch for the dietitian. This is for the writer of mystery novels? Yeah, I think he'll love it! The more wrinkles the better!

Shy Man at Party

'You have to look sharp. You'll be evaluated by the lawyers in this case!'

"He just woke up from hibernation."

It's my summer robe.

'Good news! We've finished the Christmas leftovers.'

'Can I borrow a bra, my nipples need protecting?'

"Actually, you don't have a pinched nerve...your underwear is too tight!"

Sweaters. Remember, son, we're men. We walk in, we buy, we walk out. No browsing.

'You're going to school dressed like that? I can hardly see your underwear!'