Closet Diver Gifts

Crap from a closet.

'I wonder why scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats.'

And this is a little ditty I wrote called 'the third quarters profit and loss account' ...Colin often wished that he'd followed his first love and taken up a career as a musician

'Inside Ralph is a comedienne crying to get out.'

Maria had always said you could never have too many shoes. Actually, she was wrong.

"I'm surprised, Caswell. I thought you were a happy camper."

"I have a whole closet full of running clothes I never wear."

"What's the cheapest thing we can order and still get a box?"

"Alarmingly, after five minutes the pool had come no closer."

"How many capsule wardrobes is this again?"

"Our computers will be down for an hour, so I advise everyone to hide under their desks. The last time it was total anarchy until we were back online."

'One of them's his air, the other one's his mp3 player.'

"I see it's payday again Perkins!"

'This closet needs digitized.'

Closet.

He was forced to take early retirement.

'And this is the walk-in clos..' - 'We'll take it!!'

Catholic Priest Gay Mardi Gras

"Well, he was a lousy captain, but he sure knows how to go out in style!"

"That? - oh my husband - a closet bricklayer."

'GPS systems don't work under water, so my job as a pilot fish is quite secure...'

We're all litigation crazy. Last week I had to sue my wife for joint custody of the closet.

"I'm looking for something with more closet space."

'I guess you'd call it a queer request. He wants his ashes put in a fruit jar and hidden in the closet.'

"Oh, I love this! The huge walk-in closet comes with it's own master bedroom!"

A lesbian couple diving for pearls

'He was right at his desk a moment ago.'

'Now, are you looking for a closet or something under a bed?'

"Harold is a closet intellectual and he's never coming out."

Sitting In