Closet Detective Gifts

'Your car keys are under the sofa, and you like to wear women's shoes.'

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

"So that's where all the socks ended up!"

Man in office, desk covered in computer equipment, uses floor for photos, desk pads etc.

"The camera is mounted on your desk for a reason. There's been some paperclips missing, and we think you're the culprit."

"Miss Jenkins, e-mail the housekeeper. Her telecommuting days are over"

Micro and Macro Department,

Don't forget to read the small print.

"Your curriculum vitae is extremely detailed, isn't it? I don't quite know what to make of the fact that your third-grade teacher, Miss Hartley, made you stand in the corner for throwing an eraser although another kid did it."

Jean, bring me everything we've got on gravity.

'So, what's it gonna be? Are we gonna watch a good cop show tonight, or a bad cop show?'

'We don't have anyone here by that name. Was he perhaps using one of his aliases?'

Devil in the detail

'Harlow, do you wnat to be part of the problem or part of the coverup?'

The Complete Cycle.

Missing sock

'Miscellaneous' and 'Non-Miscellaneous' trays

"I just audited our books. Your register came up five cents short, Rudy."

"You say in your resume that you're very meticulous."

"Find out who put a 100 dollar bill in the suggestion box. This person has potential!"

Hipster Police Department

'After you with the camouflage.'

'Daddy, why is that man wearing a blank T-shirt?'

"Their entire planet is coated in things called doodads, tchotchkes, trinkets, knick-knacks, bric-a-brac, and clutter."

"We need to talk about procrastination."

A Lesson in Leadership: Misplacing your keys isn't a problem, unless you have to enlist the whole school's support to find them.

When pedants take a break.

Closet.

Where missing laundry socks go!

'Talk about paranoid. He reads the fine print on his money.'

Forward Planning - The key to Success

"I noticed he had punched air holes in his desk. Now I'm afraid to open it."

"Police have no suspects at the present time but believe that the motive for robbery was the desire for increased income."