Clinginess Expert Gifts

"She seems nice. A little clingy... but nice."

L'il Buckaroo on Board.

Boy breaking off a huge icicle.

GURLERS

'Oh course!'

"You mentioned separation anxiety. Don't worry, she'll be all right."

"Fourteen months ago, I started with H20. I just ended with H20."

Bicycle Pie Chart

"You mean to say, Mr. 'Smiles,' that someone else left the scene wearing size 22 shoes?"

'This model gets great gas mileage but is recommended only for the very agile driver.'

"It cuts air resistance."

Prehistoric circus

Doctor Ernie, Animal Scientist, Answers Your Questions. A reader in Colorado asks "When should a colt be weaned from its mother?" A foal and his mommy are soon parted!

"There was a lot of tension between his ergonomics and his feng shui."

'We're looking for someone to liven up our client meetings and focus groups. Can you handle them, Chuckles?'

"You father's a nap just waiting to happen."

"We interrupt this program because the actors just can't stop giggling."

Metaphysical Bike Parts.

'What makes you think you need a new set of shoes?'

'I'm just going to our front gate for a chunner!'

"Bless this mess: The beautifully tangled reasons you *still* wear wired headphones"

Public Intellectual/Private Intellectual

'We hope you don't mind, David is particular about his lumbar support.'

'It's heat exhaustion! She's in heat and he's exhausted.'

'I wish you'd act your shoe size.'

'Kitchy, kitchy, kitchy-koo'

Laughing like hyenas.

In the podiatrist's office.

"Okay, you know so much, you fight him"

A horse rider uncomfortable in his sadle.

'I told you it wasn't a good idea to go biking in long pans because they might get caught in the chain.'

"I took an online, two-day legal course, so I respectfully disagree with you."

"Intellectual my foot! My good-for-nothing husband just sits around all day and writes stupid social media comments!"

"Why don't we ever eat out?"

...You should have turned left in corner four.