Clinginess Expert T-Shirts

"She seems nice. A little clingy... but nice."

L'il Buckaroo on Board.

Boy breaking off a huge icicle.

GURLERS

'Oh course!'

"You mentioned separation anxiety. Don't worry, she'll be all right."

"Fourteen months ago, I started with H20. I just ended with H20."

Bicycle Pie Chart

"You mean to say, Mr. 'Smiles,' that someone else left the scene wearing size 22 shoes?"

'This model gets great gas mileage but is recommended only for the very agile driver.'

"There was a lot of tension between his ergonomics and his feng shui."

"It cuts air resistance."

Prehistoric circus

'We're looking for someone to liven up our client meetings and focus groups. Can you handle them, Chuckles?'

"We interrupt this program because the actors just can't stop giggling."

"You father's a nap just waiting to happen."

'What makes you think you need a new set of shoes?'

Metaphysical Bike Parts.

"Bless this mess: The beautifully tangled reasons you *still* wear wired headphones"

'It's heat exhaustion! She's in heat and he's exhausted.'

'We hope you don't mind, David is particular about his lumbar support.'

Laughing like hyenas.

'Kitchy, kitchy, kitchy-koo'

'I wish you'd act your shoe size.'

Public Intellectual/Private Intellectual

'I'm just going to our front gate for a chunner!'

In the podiatrist's office.

"Okay, you know so much, you fight him"

A horse rider uncomfortable in his sadle.

"I took an online, two-day legal course, so I respectfully disagree with you."

"Intellectual my foot! My good-for-nothing husband just sits around all day and writes stupid social media comments!"

"Why don't we ever eat out?"

...You should have turned left in corner four.

"I don't care if you used the internet for a diagnosis. I did too."