Climate Change Worrier Gifts

"I told you we should have sold last winter."

'So much for 'Antarctica: The last wilderness': It's full of so-called Eco-Tourists now...'

'We may soon be making a mortgage payment on a house not big enough to be a decent margarita.'

'Today stocks fell on the news that the ocean rose...reversing yesterday's stock rise on news that no new polar icecaps fell into the sea.'

"Actually, I drink to forget what my car is doing to affect global warming."

"It's official"..."It's a drought!"

Child protects planet with umbrella.

"Now that's a great number if you want to be protected from the entire environment."

"I came to save you, but everything I can think to do seems like it wouldn't actually make that much of a difference."

"'How to Buy Tickets on Bezos' Spaceship so You Can Live to See Your Teens,' by Chloe Butler."

The Unsuccessful Animal Foreign Exchange Program.

'I have trouble believing in global warming when it's so cold that my nipples and p***s are the same size.'

"It's a survival instinct...they know there's an underwater pipe pumping out untreated effluent somewhere around here."

'We do a lot for the ecosystem.'

"No, no, that won't be necessary-they're doing a pretty good job on themselves."

Creator's Remorse

Lion in Winter

"What looked to be a surprise blue state surge turns out to have only been a precipitous rise in sea level."

"Global warming. Here it is December, and it feels like July."

Climate Change is a Hoax

'She was upset about breaking up with 'Phoenix',your 'plenty more fish in the sea' just made it worse!'

"The answer is space. I'm sending my kids to space."

"Sounds of the ocean upgrade...it's sounds of the antarctic icebergs cracking."

"Whenever I want my mom to play fort, I just turn on news about climate change."

'Well,one of us is definitely lost...'

One Minute Before Midnight!

"I refuse to be intimidated by climate alarmist!"

"With the way the weather is these days I went ahead and packed my bathing suit, sun screen and cross country skis."

'Of course the scientists have got this all wrong about climate change.'

Ecology

"So you want to leave Germany when the Greens come to power. . . Will you take the yacht, the lear jet or should I get you a rubber dinghy?"

Just stop (macassar) oil

"You hear that? New Zealand plans to tax cow burps. You have been warned!"

"All I'm saying is, I wished for an endless summer vacation, and now the glaciers are melting."

'Our office is on the 14th floor, Peters... you should forget about rising sea levels.'