Clergy On Holiday Gifts

'We have a clerical special to St Croix amd St Thomas...'

"Guess who brought king cake!"

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

"You may now kiss the bride..."

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

"I said he's beginning to teethe...not tithe."

Priest's 'To do' list.

'Couldn't you just bring a bucket and spade like other children?'

'I don't remember predetermining THAT!'

Two priests share a laugh outside a confessional booth

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

'Due to the poor response to the roof repair fund we cannot afford to lift the rafters when rejoicing in song.'

Golfing Bishop.

"He's on screen saver. Just tap him."

'I now pronounce you man and wife, you now may kiss you sweet little bachelor butt goodbye.'

"Excuse me, but for some reason you have us traveling with our kids."

"Today, I'll be cherry-picking from Deuteronomy."

'We're going to need to find a scapegoat.'

"Today we studied Matthew, the first in a four-part series."

Child on an airplane wearing a shirt with a switch that says "Airplane mode"

'So it's with a heavy heart that I leave you good people of St. Paul's and accept the calling to be minister at the Sunnydell Nudist Colony...'

Several generations live together in Cuba

"O Lord—why art thou such a drama queen?"

Toy Shops and Educated Children

Teaching a Sunday school class didn't end the way John imagined.

'Look, I never said salvation would be PRETTY!'

"Honey, I’ve found God!"

"In the same of the phone, the tablet, and the desktop computer."

'No, smart guy -- it means all of them at once!'

"...And do you promise if you ever should divorce that you'll remain friends?"

“Dad, I think I’ve finally found Gsus.”

A child interrupting family prayers

"Reverend, I recommend you turn the other cheek."