Chutney Aficionado Gifts

Chutney

"Too much sugar."

'A wheel? No wonder I broke a tooth. I thought it was a donut.'

Bubble gum leaves

"All the butter was gone. There was no way out. The puff pastry had to be made with margarine... from a tub."

Baby rocks!

Filling the Missile Gap

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

'What kind of filling would you like?'

"This is scary, maybe we should turn on the lights. Hello.."

"The Knuckle Sandwich is good."

'it's the last bite that worries me.'

"It's this trend that leads us to believe we should supplement our oil commodities with investments in some of the Earth's rich vinegar and crouton reserves."

'They are boneless, I didn't say anything about beaks.'

"Eat more pizza and doughnuts and stop exercising. Just kidding, you should see your face!"

Orville Wright, not sure he wants to eat airline food, brings a sandwich to his historic first flight.

Doughnut Criminals

'Son, life is a mixed blessing, they eat the fancy nuts and toss us the peanuts.'

"The second bag is a doggie bag for my schnauzer, Buddy."

'They ought to change the name of this deli to The Cramer - they get it wrong 50 of the time.'

"Do you have to put tomato sauce on everything?"

"Then there was the dream where I woke up in a pool of melted butter."

"I can't clean my room right now! Don't you always tell me to slow down and finish my meals?"

"I'm going across the street for a sandwich and coffee. Can I get you something?"

What if he could be 'churned' to the dark side?

'Your French dip, sir.'

A Donut Ride Outside of a Police Station

'Who needs sticky-notes when you've just eaten 6 jelly doughnuts.'

"I recommend the pimento loaf with pickle. It's bursting with umami."