Church Caretaker Gifts

Cathedral Made Safe.

A Verger and a Lady.

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

Cleric with bible briefcase.

"I had to skip my workout."

"Freshly ground pepper?"

Clown Ministry Baptism Today

Man runs scared from ringing graveyard bell.

'No need to yell son, I may be deaf, but I can still read.'

"Nice to see you replenishing the font with holy water vicar."

Nun Binning the Devil

"If you're sure your son doesn't mind living in a cage and eating pet food then who am I to say no?"

CCTV in church.

'Seriously Vicar, I do not think you have seen this guy in the morning service!'

Lazy plumber.

'This whole Noah's Ark business sounds like a quota system to me!'

"It's a cup holder."

Dog with a neckerchief feeds dogs in matching nappies.

Cleaner playing pool with brush.

'Dad, if God rested on the seventh day, who milked the cows?'

'That's GRAVEN images, not GRAVY images.'

Religious Maintenance: 24 Hr Callout.

A large bird house with many compartments; one is labeled "Sup't.".

"If you need anything in the building, just call the super. This is the only known photo of him."

People bell ringing - 'RING TONES'

"Any improvement since I brought the balloon?"

My Bowl Is Empty.

'If you're a nun, where's your nunchucks?'

'My Dad will like you. He's the care-taker at the monkey house in the zoo.'

'Today's sex text is the song of Solomon.'

"He says he can quit anytime, but I'm starting to worry."

Cleaner with nameplate next to Consultant Surgeon's desk.