Church Adventurer Gifts

Kid to pastor: 'Which office is heaven?'

"Trust me Jesus, if you want to make a bigger impact work on being seeker friendly."

"...and I, Pastor Smith...preaching to you now from this pulpit, speak to you from experience about the 'strong-willed' child...BELIEVE me!"

'This is my kind of place. You knock bottles off a table with a baseball and get a prize instead of time-out!'

"That's our new church mascot."

"Hey! I can see the Empire State Building!"

'I think I've now earned the right to wear God on my sleeve.'

Bankside

God is for life not just for Christmas.

I'm a gangster rap fan too!

"Pastor Bob is the leader of the flock, son, not the herd."

'I can remember when there were only farms around here.'

'Details of the summer fete can be found on our website. The address is on the notice board at the back of the church.'

'I don't think you can claim for this as a substitute car ...'

"Since you're into burnt offerings you should come over some Sunday for one of her special dinners."

Angry vicar wakes up parishioner at the Harvest Festival

"Attendance is down again this morning. If we want to continue calling ourselves a congregation, we're going to have to congregate."

"10,000 members or not, the Pastor should at least remember my name."

'Our worship space is quite large, Roger, but sanctuary committee will do nicely.'

"No concert bookings for at least two weeks. Restringing..."

Churchwarden Talking to Rector

Framed dollar in church secretary office says 'Our First Offering'

Man in woods sees sign, 'No Trespassing', next to 'Go Ahead - Make Our Day!'

'Don't worry mother, he'll be alright in London with that introduction letter to a traffic warden.'

'That Smith kid just invited us to his church on Easter Sunday!'

Pope Francis

'How well you did it will determine whether it's 'as good as done', Father.'

Scraper Biking, Manhattan, Spring, '95

Vicar

Urban Life.

Now that we're too old to migrate, we still travel, but locally. What an amazing region we live in!

"I got napkins, family photos, and the strongest lip balm in the city."