Church Admirers Gifts

NASA rocket with a church spire on top.

"It was better before God took up knitting."

"It's a letter from the Vatican. They say that whilst walking the streets without stepping into dog poo is nearly as miraculous as walking on water, it's not sufficient to canonize me!"

Kid to pastor: 'Which office is heaven?'

"Trust me Jesus, if you want to make a bigger impact work on being seeker friendly."

Benedict & Associates: Communication Strategies, Lobbying. . .

Sheep In Curlers

"That's our new church mascot."

'All it needs is a ceiling fan.'

"Giving is down at the church, so we are charging an entrance fee."

R.C.I.A.

God is for life not just for Christmas.

"Pastor Bob is the leader of the flock, son, not the herd."

'Details of the summer fete can be found on our website. The address is on the notice board at the back of the church.'

"Since you're into burnt offerings you should come over some Sunday for one of her special dinners."

'And now, concerning the special collection...'

Angry vicar wakes up parishioner at the Harvest Festival

"Attendance is down again this morning. If we want to continue calling ourselves a congregation, we're going to have to congregate."

Vicar prays for money for church repairs.

'Our worship space is quite large, Roger, but sanctuary committee will do nicely.'

"I wanted to make it look like the ones at church."

"10,000 members or not, the Pastor should at least remember my name."

'I'd prefer it if the view was closer.'

Cathedral Made Safe.

Framed dollar in church secretary office says 'Our First Offering'

Churchwarden Talking to Rector

'I hope this surprise view is worth the climb!'

'How well you did it will determine whether it's 'as good as done', Father.'

"I suppose you're like me, only signed up for the free uniform."

Pope Francis

Vicar

Vertical Tower Of Pisa.

"Although the collection plate appears to be half full, our accountant assures me that it is half empty."

"Oh, hi Pastor, I figured I didn't need to go to church - I ALREADY felt guilty."

A group of women concerned about a priest climbing a ladder