Chronic Advice Asker Pillows

'Dear Abby: I continually find myself asking for advice from complete strangers. Please help.'

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

"Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Finally, I cracked."

'So Kyle - have you considered the challenges of van driving?'

'Straight eye for the queer guy.'

"And if all else fails, wave your arms frantically."

Cheer up-things aren't so bad.....

'I took your advice and told him either I get a raise or I quit!'

Constructive Criticism 50c.

'Where you went wrong' Desk.

"Look, you're the one who asked me for some girl advice."

"I've been invited to two different thanksgivings...One with family, one with friends, which one do I go to?"

"Your father would be able to afford to send you to a good college if only he had listened to me when he was your age!"

'The problem is you're a perfectionist. You don't always have to be totally evil. Sometimes it's OK to just be annoying.'

'My philosophy has always been, sell advice, don't follow it.'

COVID tips from Wild Animals

"You're on 'Ask Sadie.' What's your problem?!"

Recruitment Agency - Tips for getting that dream job.

'Learn to relax and don't bottle yourself up.'

The girl with the sensible shoes.

'On to the office again?' - 'No, my pro.'

"I'm sorry your wife doesn't understand you, but this is a dry cleaner's."

"We can work up to antidepressants, but for now I want to start you on eating a whole jar of cocktail olives over the kitchen sink."

If you are ringing your coach to ask about your next move then we're finished.

"A word to the wise..or is it a word from the wise? I always get it mixed up."

"If you bring joy and enthusiasm to everything you do, people will think you're crazy."

'You can do whatever you want, Herb, but I sure wouldn't take advice from a bowl of alphabet soup!'

"What's your question for 'Ask Sadie'?" "My mom's in a nursing home. I think someone's stealing her jewelry." "What's the matter, you're afraid someone is stealing your inheritance?" "Simple solution: Send your mother to Japan, where their entire culture reveres the elderly." "Sayonara, grandma!!!" "Are you sure that's not just a stereotype?" "Who cares?!"

A Bug's Life Advice

'I just had to stop by and thank you for all the advice...'