Christmas Tv Aficionado Pillows

Santa Claus clicker

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

Television Readers.

"I decided to go all out on the house decorations this year."

"Just because I can deliver toys around the world in one night, doesn't mean I understand the tax code."

'I wasted half my life perched on top of a mountain in the Himalayas. Only to discover that the true meaning of life was a night in watching the box, with a few cans of lager.'

'They're just like us, except they watch more television.'

"Well, at least it's an improvement from last night."

The city of San Francisco switches from cable cars to satellite dish at a cost of only $79.99 a month for the first six months.

"Now we move over to the sports desk."

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

'Have you seen me?' (Brain missing in TV viewer)

A bunch of baseball players sitting on a baseball diamond watching TV.

Somewhere in America... the day after "The Mary Tyler Moore Show" came to an end.

'-Not THE Queen Vic?'

'No, you can't just watch the end of Bargainhunt!'

"I now pronounce you man and couch."

100 best beheadings

"It was your idea to install the TV dish on the church spire"

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

"I'm you from the future! Or the past. I've completely lost track of time."

The Old Time Television Channel

"He's an indoor cat."

'There's no such thing as 'ookawooka-itis' -- You have got to stop watching doctor shows!'

'Do you expect the jury to believe that? And, more importantly, do you expect the viewers of the eventual TV movie of this trial to believe it?'

Lady throws dart to decide which soap opera she's going to watch.

"I'm looking for a wife who likes to fish, go to the footy, play cards, watch TV, cook, drink and wash dirty socks."

Couch and Potato

"To be honest, I'm leaving public service so I can make some real money as a talking head on a cable news network."

"That's ridiculous. A red nose wouldn't work as a GPS system."

"In other news a new study indicates dogs are still better than cats."