Christmas Comedy Enthusiasts Pillows

"Then I said, let's stay with Santa's sleigh, but nooo ... you wanted to see a Rangers game!"

"... And merry Christmas to you too Santa!"

"We don't care about his nose. We won't let him play because he's not vaccinated and won't wear a mask!"

'You know who's been naughty and who's been nice? -- you're not using DNA evidence, are you?'

"Do you feel your eyes have changed any since your last visit?" "No. They seem to be ho, ho, ho, holding their own."

'Kids like my presents, but do they really like me?'

"Hi, my name is Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "And I have a drinking problem." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph."

'Wait a minute... What the heck is frankincense?'

"I don't care who's naughty or nice anymore-I only keep track of who's crossed me."

Santa Claus and the Snowman Cross Paths

"Maybe this year..."

Hip hop Santa.

"Dear Santa, This Christmas please send clothes for all those poor naked girls on daddy's computer. Love, Veronica"

'Christmas dinner's almost ready dear.'

Your dad is a union man, isn't he?

"Just because you can go around the world in one night doesn't mean you can also do your taxes that way!"

Santa Enjoys Venison.

"Don't you love the smell of burning leather boots this time of year?"

'Never mind the price, what the hell is myrhh?'

"Doesn't it seem like we just finished letting the air out of last year's tree?"

Notice! Due to COVID, all reindeer games are postponed indefinitely.

'Santas Ponzi Scheme'

'...So I figured with all of this free cooling why not install a data center?'

Visit Santa today...sponsored by Acme Razor Company

"The Three Wise Men followed a star...wasn't their GPS working?"

Santa incorporates therapy into his repertoire.

"Has your husband been exposed to Christmas at all?"

"Any chance one of you might hang around and be our sitter for New Years Eve?"

"Well, I ain't flyin' next to him!"

"You should join us for Thanksgiving."

Santa Hat Hair

"Just answer the question, sir. Is it true that you're not planning to watch 'It's a Wonderful Life' this holiday season?"