Christmas Chuckle Seeker Pillows

"My client seeks damages incurred as a direct result of your interpretation of what constitutes naughty or nice."

Bad fake tan day.

Beckett for Beginners: "Waiting for Thumbkin"

Reindeer

"Hey! Get back here!"

Santa uses his interviewing skills on his second job, too.

Magazines layout Christmas issues months in advance so a woe of cartoonists is struggling to draw Christmas gags in the July heat.

“Stop avoiding me. I know when you are sleeping. I know when you are awake.”

"It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas."

'I'm glad you came to me. Visions of ghosts of Christmas past, present and future are clearly delusions based on underlying psychological conflicts.'

'Still no Christmas card from the Pope? - We did send HIM once, didn't we?'

"...heat escapes through your head. Lose the hat and you might make it through April"

"My dad didn't get what he wanted for Christmas, so he went into his usual rage-display! So embarrassing..."

"She's not a happy camper, he forgot to make the booking, someone's in for a silent night!"

"Well, I ain't flyin' next to him!"

'Mrs Fenton, next time we have a neurotic snowman booked, get the payment up-front!'

'Sorry I Ate the Cookies Last Year.'

'I fixed it so we got the night off!'

Santa Self Esteem.

"And you say you've been erect for over 4 hours?"

Oh my goodness! Now these 500 cm of snow are melting!

'computer says no.....el!'

'You know you haven't been good, and I know you haven't been good, but good, nevertheless, is your public stance.'

"What did you think we do after the holidays?"

Even Santa outsources

'Next time make sure it's the bath plug before you pull it out.'

Rum Pah Pum Pum!

Ladder in a lift shard.

"Ever had one of those days where you don't feel the least bit jolly?"

'Yeah... and I'm the tooth-fairy!'

Satellite Santa

'Let me remind you that in our legal system we're nice until proven naughty.'

Santa delivering newspapers