Chores Aficionado Gifts

The Prodigal Son Returns To Do His Laundry

"Portrait of a Lady"

Oscar would laugh whenever he recalled his empty existence before golf.

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

Back to school.

'Fancy a game of five-a-side, boys?'

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

Raheem Sterling

Sport: Crisis in the Real Madrid.

'When I'm not thinking about me, the Giants, the Knicks or the Yankees, I'm thinking about us.'

'He's got classic form, but if he doesn't improve his grades he won't get into college. He doesn't think.'

Positively Petersham

Alice in Wonderland - Painting the Rose Tree.

Vinnie's Billiards: 'Heck of a break, Ron!'

"And now, since our local teams really stink, here are scores for actual good teams around the country that you might want to root for."

'You haven't heard the best thing. . .no referees.'

"Awfully quiet... Must be a big game on!"

The Harper Plays Cricket.

Joey Barton's red card wins Premiership League for Manchester City.

Cristiano Ronaldo

'He's missed six goals today. I bet he could kick himself.'

"Depressed, anxious, worried about the future we've had a great deal of this recently...I'd suggest you avoid watching England for a while."

Thibaut Nicolas Marc Courtois

Football.

"I need to buy a faster fastball."

Fox hunting.

"Yes, it's a sports related injury. He dropped his bowling ball."

'Yo, Corona! Pack your stuff! You've been traded.'

Snowman Football Fan.

'It took some doing, but we got your name on!'

"It was your father's idea - He can't bear to miss a second of the game."

'As avid soccer player, Roy head-bumps his playing partner's ball in for a birdie.'

"What time is it?" "Half past World Cup."

'I'm dreading the World Cup . . .'

"Would you like something by an over promoted high-price athlete or a nobody from Jersey?"