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Conversation at a country house

'The meaning of communinication is the response we get'

"I can't decide if we're good people who are bad at communicating, or monsters who communicate perfectly."

Dialogue

"I love it when you use your 'All Things Considered' voice."

With the popularity of spell-checkers, many people are turning to the new speech-checkers.

'Why don't you try seeing it from your point of view?'

Men gossiping

"Help! I'm surrounded by idiots."

"It probably got lost in the voice mail."

"Oh! It's you! I was expecting the machine."

'Your wife says you act like a fool. I thought you said she never pays attention to you.'

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

Woman on the phone.

"I feel like I don’t even know my own husband ... and it’s driving me wild!"

"Miss Duxbury, put me through to someone."

"I'm a great ... umm... like ... umm... like... umm ... communicator."

Counselor. It's annoying that he always has to have the second-to-last word

"My spokesperson won't speak to me."

Bill was so determined to Twitter no one dared tell him he couldn't do it with a calculator.

Harvey went to the kitchen to top up his gin and tonic. When he came back, things took an unexpected turn.

"No, no, that’s in a bar, Mr. President — you can talk politics and religion here."

Telephone message - 'This is a recording. If you'd like to speak to a real live human being, forgetaboutit.

"It's not easy texting my mother. She's an English teacher and all she does is correct my spelling."

"I missed your last few words. Would you please mumble them again?"

"I like them. They hate the same things we do."

Boys and Girls: Differences in Internet Surfing.

"I love my new texting app, it automatically selects peoples preferred pronouns."

MARRIAGE COUNSELOR, 'Our biological clocks are in different time zones.'

'Who's a pretty boy! Is that all you've got to say?'

"Nope! He'd never set eyes on a water cooler in all his years in the office!"

"He's in a meeting, but you have 25 seconds to leave a video message."

Trappist talk show.

'Negotiating skills need fine tuning.'

Broccoli: Just Full of Surprises!