Chinchilla Enthusiast Gifts

"Sorry, I can't come in today. My Chinchilla just escaped from its cage."

The Rooster Comedian.

'It's called 'cause and effect.' I pound this log and Tarzan goes bananas.'

'That'll teach the pesky python to be greedy and eat all my chickens!'

"I love an ape, secure in his masculinity!"

Businessman sees sign in window of 'Fred's Chili Bowl' restaurant: 'Now Hiring a Bean Counter'.

'At ease, soldier.'

"You dropped yer wallet."

'I hate all holidays!'

'Take my advice kid. Enjoy yourself now, because once you get married, your free ranging days are over.'

'Believe me, you don't want to know what's in it.'

"I suspect your headaches may be the result of you being exposed to someone with an undiagnosed case of cabin fever."

'Because it was there, Dave, because it was there.'

'This prescription will stimulate your funny bone which will cause you to laugh. We both know that laughter is the best medicine.'

Giant gorilla peers at female victim. She says into cellphone: "I can't talk now, he's right here."

Preying mantis marriage councellor.

Ed totally blows the final portion of his Chameleon Aptitude test.

'This race is simply too close to call.'

Seminal moments in Chicken History

'Let's face it George: we're not spring chickens anymore...'

'It's a kit I found online. I converted the car so it runs entirely on chicken manure.'

'Honey, the babysitter's here.'

"So, how long have you struggled with impostor syndrome?"

"Well, it's the same old story, we just don't squark anymore."

Like Minded

Not waiting for someday to look back on this and have a good laugh.

"Babies come from WHERE?!"

A bit of Newlyn.

"Yeah, our garden is always a mess: We can't stop ourselves foraging for worms..."

Free Range Chickens

'Who said you could come out of your room?'

'Back to work, McFly! You're spending too much time on that screen saver...'

"Good grief, Wilson! At least act like you're enjoying it! It's for my blog!"

"He was chained to his kennel, and since I have opposable thumbs, I was able to remove his collar and set him free..."

"I've just overheard the doctor say the farmer has the flu! We all know what that means: chicken soup!"