Chimney Sweep Humorist Gifts

"Damned cyclists."

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

"Two roads diverged in a wood and I... I... I..."

A bit of Newlyn.

"That's why safety boots are so important. . . you see? Eddie's feet have stayed perfectly dry."

"Take a shower first. You smell like a chimney."

"Don't panic Daisy dear. You can relax your buttocks, it's not the vet, it's the chimney sweep."

'Don't worry about the dishes. I did them.'

'How damp is this place? Let me put it this way: I use mold and mildew remover as a skin care product.'

'After this my bath water will never seem the same!'

"But plague spreading is all I know?"

Rudolph unblocking a chimney

'They can be a real menace at this time of year.'

'I told mom and dad we should call a chimney sweep before Christmas!'

'Why do you want a chimney sweep anyway? You're all electric...'

Father Christmas' skeleton discovered by Chimney Sweep

The Winter Chimney Cleaner

'...Then I swept down the staircase, into the ballroom.'

Sanitizer

Beginning fires for the winter - Something wrong with the chimney.

Mrs. Bortluber saves all the gunk she cleans from her computer.

Pyromania Therapy Clinic has a 'singe in' sheet.

Witch on broom followed by witch on hangglider dustpan

The Apprentice

"So what? Germs are also invisible!"

Have you had your flu shot yet?

Steeplejack.

'What'd I miss?'

'Your years of smoking like a chimney have taken their toll.'

Chimney sweep complaining about getting covered in dust

"He thinks you're playing fetch."

'Whew!'

Chimney sweep is faced with a mischievous imp.

Merry Christmas

Episcopalian Flue Jab.