Chilled Food Connoisseur T-Shirts

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

Vending machine: NO stress, only 50 cents.

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

"Regular service or affected?"

Born to be Mild.

'Nice, but it needs more angst.'

Larry was always invited on camping trips because of his ice chest

"Ah! I see you've found a cold beer to your liking, sir."

'Have you heard the news about Susan in logistics?...'

'He's so hip he even used rock 'n roll-on deodorant.'

'Careful. The plates are extremely cold.'

Frozen Food - Pick Your Own

"Business trip, eh? Gee, that's too bad."

'Fred's a lot more relaxed since he began viewing life as just another spectator sport.'

"No thanks. I had a cracker in April."

"Do you want the rest of this mouse? It tastes gamey to me."

'Honey, I'm looking fat in white!' 'Trust me, dear. In a few months, the pounds will be melting away.'

'I don't want to eat this. I want to eat organic foods.'

Gentrification of the Fridge.

'California: Here I come!'

'The upside is that it will guarantee you get laid, the downside is that there's a four year wait.'

'Well it was a pretty good year.'

'Personally, I've always liked Bordeaux with my Swiss.'

"So what do you plan on accomplishing today?"

'I don't see how you were able to work for so many years. Since you've retired you can't do a thing.'

Dad's Diner - 'The best in frozen foods'.

'I don't know about you, but I'm getting tired of frozen dinners!'

"When you have to shovel your driveway, stupid weather... When you've paid someone to shovel your driveway, stupid weather..."

Kitchen chef

"Did you leave that hairdryer on again..?"

'French onion soup. Hold the soup.'

'Have you considered having central heating installed?'

"Oh, no, he couldn't start this dairy farm in California or Hawaii. It had to be Wisconsin!"