Childhood Nostalgia Seeker Gifts

'Don't act too happy that school's out. You'll hurt our teacher's feelings.'

"You first."

Musical Chairs: Because kids don't already have a hard time fitting in.

Child From Another Planet.

Child Development

Loan officer to man: 'Hey, aren't you the bully who used to steal my money when I was in the third grade?'

"I want custody of the kid. He's the only one who knows how to operate the VCR"

At little Jessica's tea party, nobody ate a bite, claiming they were stuffed

Ted hits puberty...

Alice Through the Looking Glass - Alice and the Fawn.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't realize the water balloons had already frozen..."

Storm poised to hit the mid-Atlantic Coast...'But this time it's a school day!'

"At least the anti-public education folks haven't started to try to dictate what we can have for lunch."

"Quietly confident."

'Do I use the slide or the merry-go-round? I haven't even touched the swings. I don't know. I don't know.'

"First things first - let's discuss our terms of reference."

'That's your answer for everything? Suck your thumb?'

'I've had the place gob-stopper-dashed.'

Birthday Rush

Benjamin Bunny re-writes Beatrix Potter

"I told him to get in touch with his inner child and he kicked me in the shin!"

'My summer vacation viewing, by Edward Ramsey.'

"Now let's go to EACH OTHER'S mom to get washed and see what happens."

"I'm not EITHER prejudiced - I didn't even know you WERE a girl!"

"Can Billy come out to hunt and gather?"

'You take that back! My mom is too a virgin.'

"Really, Elwood...you have a pet snail?"

First day of School: Before and After

"Poor jelly babies. It's a short like, and a chewy one."

'Their disability not withstanding she severed their tails.'

Barney Vs. Godzilla

"That's not you talking, Justin, that's the sugar talking."

"The inflatable pool is a harsh mistress."

"It's not a backpack."

Children's Messages and Lists for Santa Clause