Childhood Charmers T-Shirts

"Don't worry—it's just a phase."

'Hey, Thunder Thighs, Bean Pole's here!'

A family trying to make a child smile for a photo

"When will I be old enough to have an inner child?"

'Let's play doctor - I'll listen to your heart and you give me all your allowance.'

"'A', I'm adorable."

My corn is undercooked. It hasn't even popped!

'When a doctor looks in your ear with that pointy thing- what's he looking for...?'

"Wait. Let it breathe."

'Just tell him you've been good. Don't overdo it.'

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

"So like, it's so cool to finally meet you in person."

"There's definitely enough growing room."

Samurai offspring.

"I'm worried about him - he's praying to Mrs. Butterworth."

"Don't you just love them when they're that age?"

'I had a good share and tell, Ms. Gibbs, but my family made me sign a confidentiality agreement.'

'It's rude to talk to someone with your sunglasses on - they can't see your . . er . . limpid pools of loveliness.'

'He's a born politician.'

"Vous avez pris rendez-vous?"

An Irishman unfamiliar with how a telephone works

"Look at the silly grin on his face -- I bet his imaginary playmate is a girl!"

Thought bubbles and speech bubbles

'Ohhh....I love your accent!'

'Little Tommy is so romantic - He's letting me mind his tadpoles.'

'So, your place, or my mother's.'

Sex and the Old City

"You're looking good today. Is that a new dress? By the way, I'm sure this is a mistake...maybe you can raise it to..."

"...and wagging your tail isn't going to get you off the hook."

"Reading, writing, AND arithmetic - I'm too YOUNG to multitask!"

By borrowing his niece every Friday night, Vern had found a surefire way to meet women.

'The dog and cat followed me home, the bird flew in the window and the fish swam up the toilet. Obviously I have animal magnetism.'

'Okay, so I'll ask someone else to marry me!'

STRIP Racing children upset by starter gun

"I put Nanny and Grandad's false teeth under my pillow."