Child Wrangler Pillows

"It wasn't me jumping up and down and yelling in class. It was the sugar talking."

Quiet Time

"Personally, I can't imagine what mom did with all her free time before we came along!"

"I'll be a bit late... sorry."

'I'm lost, did you happen to see a lady without a boy like me ?'

"This tantrum has been powerful, honest and riveting, and I think we should just give him what he wants."

"Choo choo doesn't work any more. Try money!"

"Our kids? No - we thought they were your kids."

"We've decided your suggestion to have a day care center here at work has merit."

"You are the best mom ever."

"Are you ready to see the Johnson child now, Doctor?"

Parenting Business Deals

"Hey! Who's this little guy?"

"It's Mother's Day. It's your turn to watch the kids."

"How far can you throw a tantrum?"

"Are you sure they don't include children?"

"You call this a presentation?! I knew I shouldn't work with children or animals!"

Kindergarten Primary School Teacher

"This is System One and I am holding the beta for System Two."

"Bobby does have a tendency to be a bit active!"

'I don't know whether the kids will be a comfort in our old age but they'll certainly get us there quicker.'

Mother Holds Toddler on Lead and Toddler Holds Puppy on Leash.

'Slippery When Wet'.

'Here comes the great arbitrator.'

'Whatever surprise he's cooking up for you, I'm sure you've a good sense of humour!'

'George had a feeling this long-haul-flight wasn't going to be as peaceful as he had hoped!'

'He never has an energy crisis.'

'You the woman who advertised for a babysitter?'

"Took your time getting here, didn't you?"

Children on harnesses being pulled apart by their mothers.

'It's your babysitter, where do you keep your fire extinguisher?'

Escape on a treadmill

"He seems more determined this time...."

'Sorry, Holly!'

Uncle lacking the 'aquired taste' for children