Child's Play Enthusiast Gifts

'Do you want to play doctor?' 'I can't, you're not insured.'

'But, Mom, being good just doesn't work for me.'

"Do that again, but cuter."

'Guess what? I fixed your jack-in-the-box.'

'I hear you can tell how big they will get by the size of their feet.'

Haircuts

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

Director/Action Man toy.

Build your very own conflict of interest!

"She's been so creative lately."

'Call for you on the cream corn line.'

A midwife holding a baby

"Tommy!"

"Guys, can you use your Mommy-doesn't-want-to-know-I-exist voices?"

"Just because I can deliver toys around the world in one night, doesn't mean I understand the tax code."

"Look what I found. Can we keep him?" "Wow! A real pirate!!" "Go ask your mother."

'How do you like my two-tone car?'

"Werewolves of London..."

Struggling with issues from his own childhood, the Bedroom Bandit would sneak in and jumble children's room across the nation. Not a mother believed it.

'I'd like to return this, please.'

Toy Shops and Educated Children

"Soon you'll be sucking your thumb AND tying your shoes...they call it multitasking."

Perks Featured in Vacancy at Toy Company

'I've never opened her up on the highway, but I get great mileage in the city!'

"Where the hell's my Slinky?"

'How's the water skiing?'

"It's his emotional support animal."

"Everyone says she has the clutter of someone twice her age."

"Of course I'm bored - my batteries are flat!"

Childlike love

"They look so young and helpless."

"Graduation day at kite flying school."

One!

"Kid gloves, Hernandez. You gotta use kid gloves!"