Chicken Chaser Gifts

'We'll find your babies, ma'am. But you'll have to calm down and finish giving us the perp's description first.'

'It was a heck of a race, Tom, but unfortunately too close to call.'

"We're free-range. Why not run for it?"

Things are usually pretty quiet aound here at night - But every once in a while, this nutjob shows up and makes a scene, Don't try to apprehend him yourself - Really cuckoo, that one,

Biker Chicks

"Hey come on buddy...have a heart!"

"Tia Carmen says you guys are from Chicago. What part?"

"But before you even think about going under the knife, I'd like to recommend a good pluck and cook man."

"Running of the the chickens!? This is crazy! Dad, no one celebrates Hispanic Heritage Month like this!"

Another reason chickens cross the road: 'It's supposed to be good for the gizzard!'

Coward

'Our Dr. Brooks is developing a chicken that not only lays larger eggs, but toast and hash browns to go with them.'

Farmer and Chicken Coop.

'They are poached eggs, sir -- we grabbed them when the chicken wasn't looking!'

'Do you sell eggs? . . . I forgot to say that I have middle class guilt. . .'

this place got five stars for its fresh food

Fresh eggs...extremely fresh eggs.

Bob liked free-range chicken - but not the fast ones.

Entry-level positions at KFC.

"Smaller, more powerful chips allow me to have a smaller head."

'By golly, I think we've got ourselves a prodigy!'

"Let's try for dignified yet playful, while maintaining the spirit of preservation."

The Running of the Brie

"You look ridiculous Ed. Why can't you just accept you're going bald and ditch the wig?"

'Must you have chips with everything Sir Francis.'

Letter writing lady.

Tango

'One of the good things about being a dung beetle is that my kids are not fussy eaters...'

'I used to have a regular restaurant, but it kept burning down.'

'I never knew there was a common ancestor of man and chicken.'

Sandwich snob.

'Diet? Yeah I'm on a prop's diet...pies,chips,burgers and coke!'

"I guess it's an OK job. Minimum wage plus all you can eat. I tried to quit once but couldn't get out the door."

Fortune teller describes to angler the size of the fish he's going to catch.

Houdini re-incarnated.