Chess Novice Gifts

World's Worst Chess Player! Play A Game And See $2

Skiing.

Cheers For The Hollyhock Middle School Chess Team

"Your son is asking a lot of questions about the giant hands in the sky that controls everything."

Math 101, for those who can only count to 100.

Today we learned to count to one.

Sweep the board.

'And this is Allan...he's the brain in the family!'

"You moved two spaced and then one space to the side? Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, that sure sounds illegal."

To attract a bigger audience, the world chess federation allow fans to distract an opponent when it's his move.

'Upgrades? Yes, we've programmed it to excrete a few drops of water if it should lose a chess match. You know - tears.'

'Some people just aren't cut out for adventure gaming, Bruno — maybe you should try chess or checkers.'

Man mourns the loss of his king after being checkmated.

Target your message

"Damnit—Every game ends in stalemate."

'I think they're up to something.'

'I don't think there's any hope for my golf game.'

Man and brain

"Frankly, we’re concerned about your checkered past."

'Checkmate I think!'

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

Prawn Amend

A gorilla plays chess with his keeper.

Peer-reviewed journal publication.

'Checkmate!'

"Damn it, Gwendolyn, you know when you married me I only moved one square at a time."

AIDS prevention

Existential Risk

Bee Chess

"It's a 12 inch chess board - the game's a foot."

'I can not get this game, the pieces all move like cats.'

"This is my first book, but if I like it I may buy another in the near future."

Man playing chess from his parked car.

Competitive tic-tac-toe

Chess on TV