Chemical Curious Gifts

'We'll need a different package. It deems the new preservative dissolves cardboard.'

Hair Crop Circle

"Yeah, I know. bu tthe administration didn't want to appear culturally insensitive."

Sexual chemistry set

"When it comes to fixing his own computer, I call it his PDDIY project. That stands for please DON'T do it yourself."

"But but ... if we remove all the additives there'll be nothing left!"

'I'm inventing an acid that eats through anything.'

Molecules You Ought to be Aware Of.

"Some genetic engineers we turned out to be!"

'Just for kicks, let's come up with something that has a good side effect.'

'Forget it lads. We've been refused planning permission for this one!'

Cursing Scientist.

'This is the one - we want you to pray for this one.'

"For the hundredth time—I have no idea how to make crystal meth."

"Maybe we should have tried it on the rats first."

"Dad, can you tell me what a solar eclipse is?"

Professor Urquat makes his final contribution to the world of science.

"If you put little crosses on your sevens people will think you're French."

"Oh, it's always something now he wants to become a vegetarian."

Punch Initials - O

"But you both can't be the 'father' of Ammonium Pentoxide Phosphate."

'If you're going to stare at that thing all day, at least watch something educational,,, like Japan,'

Confusion in A Jar.

'...then add some of the yellow powder to those blue crystals, heat it for a while, and see how you like it.'

A man and a woman click together.

Laboratory- risk assessor

'I'm calling maintenance to tell them about the leak in the ceiling. The acid rain is neutralizing our basic research.'

Sugar-coated riboflavin yellow #5 fructose surbosic-carboblutonic flakes.

'How's the new insomnia pill going?'

'Hon, did you see that ultra-adhesive compound I brought home from the lab?'

Mobile.

Chinese man has apple land on his head - which inspires him to invent gunpowder.

Fortune teller using a computer rather than traditional methods

"I don't need the glasses, I had 3D laser eye surgery."