Chelsea Champion Pillows

Best Before 5th Pint.

Beers

'Not that slowly back...'

'I'm stressed: My dad was a champion, my mum was a champion, there's a lot of pressure on me to become a champion...'

Brownie Points

A man playing guitar beneath a balcony with his hat ready for cash

An incident from the Eglinton Tournament, scene 2.

'Stop gritting your teeth!'

Another entry from the encyclopedia of gaming: Pixel sprain - any physical injury incurred from intense video game play.

Welcome to summer school.

'1875 - Captain Matthew Webb becomes the first man to swim the English Channel.'

'To the only thing that matters - BASEBALL!'

The First Tattoo

"You might like my daughter. She's single and desperate too."

Chi Kick

'Oh what's the use? You don't know the course.'

'Without you as a friend, I'd be a hopeless drunk by now'

Upon winning another bowling championship, Dalton throws his ball to the spectators.

"What's next?"

'The games console has saved us a fortune in holidays. We told him we were seeing the pyramids but we were actually in Skegness. He didn't notice.'

'Hold everything! -- The National Endowment for the Arts changed its mind!'

'Any hot prospects on the horizon, Cathy?. . . Anyone new within a three-foot radius who's vaguely tolerable?'

"Baldo, when's the last time you read a book?"

'I hate Mondays!'

'Sure, I catch it once in a while, but nothing beats the chase.'

Mouse Party