Checkout Sprinter T-Shirts

'She's in training for the Olympics. The 100 metre sprint to the checkout.'

"I actually saw ten gay characters on television this week—which almost balanced out the 2,174 straight characters I saw."

Professional man hurdling

"This guy's a terrific defensive lineman. I once saw him chase down a quakerback for nearly 40 yards before sacking him. It was in a shopping mall, but still..."

'We are in a race against time and the auditors. Gentlemen...start your shredders!'

"You're doing great - keep it up."

T-Rex Racing: A Short-Lived Sport

He won't stop talking about being the fastest ever. He's a broken record about breaking a record.

Runner's High, Runner's Low

"Let's just get through the first aisle...then we'll discuss your impulse buying."

'The publisher wants to know how the article on the booming economy is coming along.'

Time Run

Cheetah in at the start of a race, thinking: 'Why do I have to keep proving myself?'

"I've got a lot of stuff, a ton of coupons, and I pay by check, so all you behind me...get comfortable!"

'I ran the mile in two minutes. I took a short cut.'

'How come they're making size 16 smaller these days?'

"When it came to running, Kevin was second to none."

'As many items as I want or no customer!'

10 items or less

'Sir, wait! You can't go yet! The register hasn't finished spitting out all your valuable coupons.'

"There it sat, still as night, in the bagging area ..."

'Spinout!'

Little girl running alongside athlete asking for autograph.

"I wrote my thesis in just one day. Is there something wrong with that?"

"Who's next?"

'Is it my fault the supermarket trolley had a mind of its own?'

'Wow! She's fast. She even had time to do her shopping!'

Elderly couple bearing a sign: '...We take ages.'

'I can't find my keys!'

Huge, steroid taking sprinter.

"Talk about pressure, they've already purchased the 'new & improved' labels."

'I'm going to have to scan, it could take a while.'

'Unexpected item in bagging area!'

'D'you want to see me run the 100 metres? ...D'you want to see it again?'

Express till 'Ten over priced items or less'