Chatter Gifts

Wordplay 11. Repetition & on & on & on. . .

'She doesn't just hold a conversation, she strangles it.'

"She's in a conversationally induced coma."

'Complete sentences?? Jeez, how verbose can you get?'

'I don't understand: I lick the plates clean, but Mistress still puts them in the dishwasher afterwards...'

'Thanks mum, it's just what I always wanted!'

"At least their bull sessions are green. Everything they say is 100% biodegradable."

Phone solicitors like customers who are afraid to hang up.

Social Notworking

"We just can't justify the expense of cheese, let alone the upkeep of the maze."

Sure, he can talk already, but it's all just psychobabble.

Now showing - "What's the least noisy film we can chat through?"

"Your difficulty communicating how you really feel, is because of your inherent inability to display complex emotion."

Turn on chat. Delete conversation.

'From the Mouth of Arthur Baskin.'

'Are you in here tonight?'

Hot Line

"You know that on-line romance you've been carryin' on? Well this here's Samantha!"

"You're not fooling me. I can spot 'fake mews'."

'We know it makes you happy, but your father and I think you're spending too much time on the computer.'

'Can't you tell people about our new swimming pool without saying I've 'gone off the deep end?''

'I'll slap the both of you if you don't knock off the chit chat.'

"I was like 'OMG,' and she was all 'No way', and I was like 'Yes, way', and she was...uh-oh, gotta run."

"It's lunchtime! Have you finished saying 'Good Morning' on your WhatsApp Groups?"

"I'd love to talk. I'm on a train!"

'HEY,no Tongue!'

Well look, I'm afraid I really must run...

'What's that supposed to mean!?!'

'The reason I never finish my homework is that I spend too much time tweeting about how I have too much homework.'

"No problem, B. J. I can talk and baste at the same time."

'I tell you what: Mistress' lap was so much more comfortable before she started her diet...'

"We had him neutered,"

"The Over-Sharing Economy"

New Space Shuttle Mission: Deployment of the First Orbiting Telemarketer

I was telling him a story of my granddaughter's wedding.