Chart Enthusiast Gifts

"I'll pause for a moment so you can let this information sink in."

"Hold everything! The P.R. department just sent over this chart."

"My job is in finance. This is just my hobby."

"There is only one explanation..."

'He's free range.'

Information vs. confusion

'Now, keep in mind that these numbers are only as accurate as the fictitious data, ludicrous assumptions and wishful thinking they're based upon!'

'This red line indicates the change in this red line over a period of time,'

'That's it! That's the chart we've been looking for.'

Management of Change

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

'Ok team.. let#s review: When the arrow goes down it mean...'

'At this point, I'll ask all of you to follow me to the conference room directly below us!'

'At our last meeting we decided to go for broke. Well, mission accomplished.'

"We're changing our sales plan. From now on, instead of trying to get lots of customers, we're going to find just one really,really rich person to buy a whole lot of stuff."

'And this chart shows our rate of growth.'

Though he had been retired for only three days, Marilyn was already growing tired of having Clyde around all day long.

"How are my sales doing?"

"And this projected sales increase has a margin of error of 100%."

Organisational Structure

"So if you don't mind, I'll just go ahead and read out each slide word for word in a droning monotone until you all yearn for the sweet release of death."

"I recommend our 'wild' expectations be downgraded to 'great.'"

'Unfortunately, this, here, is still a mystery.'

"The danger with studying anything this closely is that you lose sight of the context."

Expenses/Income. "Our only problem is working out how to switch these."

'Gentlemen, If I may say so - we have arrived.'

'We're holding our own, but I'd really like to see some growth.'

'Before we examine the company's last quarter, let me remind you 25$ can go a long way...'

"Until we get a bigger chart, we're estimating it's now about up to here."

"At first I thought it was just coincidence, then I noticed it corresponded perfectly to your shift."

'The problem seems to be pointing in your direction, Ferguson.'

"...and this chart shows people clearly prefer bar graphs to pie charts."

'And exactly how much less did it cost to implement Five Sigma instead of Six, Dwayne?'

'...The good news is the Guggenheim has offered $2,500,000 for our chart.'

Man stabbed by fallin arrow on wall chart.