Charging Procrastinator Pillows

'Sorry I'm late, Fred. I forgot to plug in the car.'

'I couldn't think of a science fair project so I just re-invented the wheel.'

"If you're smart enough to design a robot to do your homework, then you're certainly smart enough to just do your homework."

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

"I did my report on time travel, but my dog ate my homework in the future."

"I'd rather eat your homework."

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

Serious Putty

"Sorry, my report is blank. I just stayed home, watched tv and played video games during vacation."

Cat puts off paying gas bill, to sleep longer...

'1001 things to do whilst waiting to get on the internet.'

"This next song's from the soundtrack to the film of the book I never got around to writing."

Housewife: Out of Order.

'I forgot to do my homework so can we plow into a snow bank on the way to school?'

"Things to do today: 1) stare out window 2) crap on new bedspread 3) stare out window 4) claw up ottoman 5) stare out window 6) take nap."

Nethead strip: Over doing the time spent on the computer

"I can't mow the lawn today. A bug just flew up my nose."

Studying and technology

Obedience school was tough. Especially the homework, which he would do and then eat.

'When does the improvement phase of this home improvement project begin?'

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

Al, The Go-From Guy

'I put Wilson on your project and last I heard he was all over it!'

Invaders from Planet Manava.

Is your homework finished? It's almost a snow day. No way

'Hey, boss, what's a 7 letter work starting with 'w' that represents what I should be doing rather than solving crossword puzzles?'

'Work's the greatest thing on earth... so I'm saving some up for tomorrow!'

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

'You didn't practice last night,did you?'

"Oh no, I never replied to Theresa's email! And tomorrow I must call Steve.... What does Yara think of me?"

'Do excuse Ed's immobility - he's being regulated.'

"The pastor can't be disturbed. He's preparing for Sunday's service."

Holiday Shopping for Guys

Kid about report on alternative fuels being due today: 'I just couldn't summon up the energy to do it.'