Charcuterie Gifts

"Salamelier"

"Give it to me straight doc, am I cured?"

Cloud Cuckoo Land, Hamburger bar, "I don't like the look of this Charlie"

Every barbecue has its winners and losers.

Cow's Last Will and Testament.

'Steak Ted?'

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poetry

'Oh, and I suppose I'm the only one who's ever heard it's a 'dog eat dog world'?'

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

View to the Future

"Rump roast?"

A Bloody Butcher

Important Food Groups

"Mommy's going to teach you how to make a hamburger."

'Is it guilt that when you eat us that we are no longer called pigs but bacon, pork chops or ham?'

'I love it when you spoon me.'

A couple dressed as a knife and a fork

Artisan hot dog stand has pigs tethered to it.

A cow goes to the Fortune Teller - 'I can see two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun...!'

Deliboys

'Next Please...' (Joe's Sharpening Service).

Butcher's shop has 'Cuts of salami' sign: End, Middle, Other End.

The pig that had a glimpse of the afterlife.

'I had no idea would be a choice.'

Where 'Turkey Bacon" Comes From

A butcher announcing he will kill his own meat

Culinary surgery.

Where Ignorance is Bliss.

"On second thought, just give me the ham and forget the roast beef."

"We get all our meat from a man dressed like a butcher."

"What do you have that won't kill me?"

'Sure, we pay them for protection but there are unexpected bonuses: nobody can tenderise veel like Luigi or slice beef as fine as Vinny.'

'I see adventure in your future. Yes. You're going to be a culinary adventure.'

"I'll see your Sirloin and raise you a New York Strip."