Chaotic Landscaper T-Shirts

'Oh no! It's the flying gardener.'

'I had a wonderful garden last year. Bark beetles, aphids, mealy worms, thripes, wax seal, gray mold, and grubs!'

'Ugh Look The whole garden is just one giant cat toilet'

The Music Seed

"He's declared it an area of natural beauty"

"Yeah, our garden is always a mess: We can't stop ourselves foraging for worms..."

Leaf-Blowers: Loudly making yardwork someone else's problem since the 1960s.

Industrial Beautification van

'I SAID you'd threatened to throw them out once too often!'

"I got you some flowers..watered them, too.".

"Jeepers, what happened to your power cord?"

Gone to seed.

Sophisticated garden - low maintenance garden

"The latest news on the gardening fashion front is 'Ditch the decking'!"

'Everybody's entitled to have a hobby. Mine's growing grass.'

Hedgecutter cutting a hedge 'key' into a hedge 'door'

Women look out at overgrown garden as man reads sports section. Wife says: 'He reckons he can't mow it as he's turned it into a wildlife reserve.'

"Charles! Enough with the mulch!"

"The cat was there."

Cat gardener/cleaner about to step on rake

'My therapist suggested I redirect my anger into landscaping and gardening!'

'What am I doing? Well, I'd planned on going to the office and goofing off...then I remembered I'm retired.'

'Bugleweed makes a nice ground cover, and you don't have to set your alarm.'

"It's the great pumpkin massacre"

The world's first riding lawn mower.

'So what's all this I hear about you installing an interesting water feature in your garden?'

"I see you've laid out your garden."

Gardener's Calendar: Keep an eye open for pests

'I decided to pimp my wheelbarrow.'

'The gardener in him sold out to the nature-conservationist.'

Leaf Blower Showdown.

'How's your garden?' - 'It's getting too much for me so I'm paving it.'

Keep Off The Plastic Grass

'I'll just have time to finish the yard before the next bombing run begins.'