Chaos Contractor Gifts

"Remodeling? No. Just looking for the remote."

IN box...OUT is wastepaper basket on fire.

In/Out/These Things Happen.

The Baby Walker

'From six to to eighteen, they're always at that age.'

"Well, isn't that embarrassing."

'Honey, where's my cell phone?'

"Quick, start the car!"

"The meeting will come to order."

Here and There Trays

A Communal Breakfast for the Young

"Guys, can you use your Mommy-doesn't-want-to-know-I-exist voices?"

Why it's bad when home owners change their minds about the bathroom's location late in a building project.

"Maureen Alsop is leaving her magnolia, and her delphinium and her cats with us this weekend."

"Force quit! Force quit! Force quit!!"

'You'll soon get the hang of it - then they'll change it.'

Homo Gamus

Future garbage truck driver.

"I've told you before one at each end!"

A Highlander Chasing Dogs with a Knife and a Broom.

'What was all that swerving at the cat walk?'

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

'What has twelve legs and barks?'

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

'Great Therapy!'

Girl who can't cook meets guys who can't fix stuff.

"It's crazy here! They're all on recreational rugs."

Struggling with issues from his own childhood, the Bedroom Bandit would sneak in and jumble children's room across the nation. Not a mother believed it.

Bears going water skiing.

Riding School Chaos

"Sir, your ducks, they are not in a row."

'I'm glad you're able to be with us more, but I'd appreciate it if you'd say you're 'spending time' with us, not 'doing time' with us.'