Chaos Contractor Gifts

"Remodeling? No. Just looking for the remote."

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

IN box...OUT is wastepaper basket on fire.

In/Out/These Things Happen.

The Baby Walker

'From six to to eighteen, they're always at that age.'

"Quick, start the car!"

'Honey, where's my cell phone?'

"Well, isn't that embarrassing."

"The meeting will come to order."

Sounds that various toys make when they are vacuumed up.

Here and There Trays

"Guys, can you use your Mommy-doesn't-want-to-know-I-exist voices?"

A Communal Breakfast for the Young

'Hey Einstein, how about converting some of your mass into energy and getting this place cleaned up?'

Why it's bad when home owners change their minds about the bathroom's location late in a building project.

"Maureen Alsop is leaving her magnolia, and her delphinium and her cats with us this weekend."

"Force quit! Force quit! Force quit!!"

'You'll soon get the hang of it - then they'll change it.'

Homo Gamus

Future garbage truck driver.

Girl who can't cook meets guys who can't fix stuff.

Struggling with issues from his own childhood, the Bedroom Bandit would sneak in and jumble children's room across the nation. Not a mother believed it.

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

'Great Therapy!'

"I've told you before one at each end!"

Bears going water skiing.

'What has twelve legs and barks?'

"It's crazy here! They're all on recreational rugs."

A Highlander Chasing Dogs with a Knife and a Broom.

Riding School Chaos

Mayhem, Inc. Part 29

'What was all that swerving at the cat walk?'

"Sir, your ducks, they are not in a row."